i. the mind always sees what's missing and tries to fill the void with worry.
ii. daily happenings doesn't keep me occupied enough to save me.
iii. a glimpse of my mind will prove to be challenging; watch out for dead ends.
iv. it is far simpler to keep worrying away than to ignore it.
v. i will never know what goes on inside your head; you give me headaches.
vi. you will never know how loudly silence can speak until you're ignored.
vii. it's been way too long and yet still not long enough; how long must i wait?
(c) 2008 mai kozai
silence is also music. {9:47 AM}
Saturday, October 20, 2007
windowpanes and umbrellas
it is like the fuzzy noise coming from the television, turned to the channel with no signal.
it is similar to popcorn in the microwave, popping and exciting the senses.
it could resemble the release of stress, the joints cracking and relaxing as they please.
it belongs in the impatient lover, pacing the room with heavy, directionless feet.
it can be found in a busy corporate office, as numbers and letters appear one by one on computer screens.
it is a million grandfather clocks in one room, second hands ticking and tocking at different tempos.
it is strikingly similar to the crackling of the record before the needle finds the tune.
blind the sight and i am all of these, open them again and i am only a gloomy day.
(c) 2007 mai kozai
silence is also music. {8:59 AM}
Thursday, September 27, 2007
haikus for the weary-hearted
i. incarceration is the heart's lament, perhaps the heart's cry for help.
ii. these written words should not be taken seriously for the poor mind's sake.
iii. keep my damn mouth shut so i won't get in trouble for being myself.
iv. but should silence speak, i am doomed, for i can't speak nor remain muted.
v. if "salt to the wound" is as painful as they say, let wound be the mouth.
vi. the heart will swallow everything that you want heard to save itself grief.
vii. the heart will listen to the words you do not say and patiently wait.
viii. unfortunately, the heart cannot receive a needed holiday.
ix. what i do not say is what i want to say most but cannot orate.
x. the weary heart speaks only when it knows it is safe to rest in yours.
all haikus (c) 2007 mai kozai
silence is also music. {10:15 PM}
Sunday, July 01, 2007
haikus for a breezy day
i. the leaves said to me, "you should get out more often." but i'm so lazy.
ii. pausing for some time. i can hear the minute hand hissing at my back.
iii. thinking about you even after all these years these feelings remain.
iv. annoying headache too much sleep or not enough blame it on the muse.
silence is also music. {6:00 PM}
Friday, September 08, 2006
a thought from the speculative optimist
it's like painting a cloud for the blind man who has never seen it before, or trying to describe a three-dimensional figure to someone trying to make out your words past all the static of the mingling soundwaves, "so is the trapezoid in front of the cube?" "no, no, the side of the trapezoid is tangent with the bottom of the cube." "which side of the trapezoid?", they will say, "the left side," you'll answer, irritated. "well, what's left? how's the trapezoid drawn? how big is it? where is it in realtionship to the canvas? how large is the canvas?"
and even though you do no expect the outcome to be a joan miro, though the blind man could never fully appreciate the cloud, could still a silver lining be drawn between the lines on a widow's forehead, across the protruding ribs of a malnutritioned orphan, underneath the facade of an aching heart?
(c) 2006 mai kozai
silence is also music. {11:10 PM}
Saturday, August 19, 2006
warning
bright shadows dance around your face and light up your eyes, giving even the most speculative the illusion that you are in love. but you're scared that it's only an elusion, an elision of the doubt you've made a life motto. but as the shadows come closing in, you realize that they've exonerated you from the suffocation of smothered emotions, the collision of multiple dead ends, the lesions of your broken heart. if your doubts are comfort, then they will surely deceive you, even when elation gives its hand in companionship, even when chances are legion.
(c) 2006 mai kozai
silence is also music. {6:34 PM}
Saturday, July 15, 2006
convenience of the sea
open waters, swimming, splashing, gulps of air, lung capacity met. yesterday conversed with calm waves, today never witnessing any sun. you are ever-wavering, with the wind, you soar, with the night, you slumber, with new day, you remorse, with soothing sounds, you pacify. yet you never fail in the cycle of coming and going as you please.
(c)2006 mai kozai
silence is also music. {1:36 PM}
the poet
mai sharona.
december 5, 1984.
davis, california.
a sucker for flowers.
