silence is also music.

Friday, September 26, 2003

eyes

glimmer, shimmer,
his eyes full of life.
and mine,
deadly lento.
slowly moving, dragging
its vision, blurring
his.
am i falling
or is he picking
me up?
am i dying
or is he fueling
my blood?

where did he pick up
trash, extra luggage
like me?
why does he continue
to lug me around?
slowing him down is all
i do.

"the view is beautiful tonight," he says.
i trace his eyes to see what he is referring to,
and i find his vivacious eyes meet my lifeless ones.
silent lips, but eyes full of words,
reading through the pages of his book.

and the moon was blushing
between the clouds.

(c)2003 mai kozai

silence is also music. {5:30 PM}

Thursday, September 25, 2003

*sidenote: nothing from my past experiences, just a random poem. didn't mean for it to turn out this way, but enjoy.

enchantress

come, come.
i am the enchantress of the emerald
forest
where flowers are my remedy
and birds are my children.

i can soothe your deepest agony,
cure your most burdensome scar
if only you'll let me.

i can vanish your worst nightmare,
crush your biggest fear
if only you'd trust in me.

but you don't, do you?

no... i suppose not.
but if you did, well;
you poor human.
every man
falls for my
trap
because they are so naive.

but i do as i promised.
i just leave new turmoil to replace the old.

and love's troubles bring you back to me
because forbidden fruit always tastes sweeter,
doesn't it?

(c)2003 mai kozai

silence is also music. {12:07 PM}

*sidenote: one of the few poems i've written with a touch of humor.

first day

thursday morning, alarm sounds
and my mind rebounds
from slumber as the constant reminder resounds
through my ears and echoes,
echoes,
echoes

like voices in my head
telling me something else instead,
"go back to bed,"
but i don't; dreaming, i've done for too long.

wake up and a yawn,
to this day yet to be drawn,
blank canvas at dawn,
but enriched with colors soon enough.

now where did i put my painbrush...

silence is also music. {10:05 AM}

Tuesday, September 23, 2003

missing hands

smouldering heat clouding my head,
but my hands carry the knowledge.
you need not worry;
these hands only have one key.

shivering my nerves, this frigid wind,
but my hands unusually warm.
i need not worry;
they are in good hands.

swatting the air around me
catching nothing but emptiness.
but i need not worry;
one of these days, they will capture the treasure.

searching for its equal,
so one day, it will not be alone.
but we need not worry;
for if wholeness is once experienced,
they can not easily forget.

you complete me.

(c)2003 mai kozai

silence is also music. {10:46 PM}

sweet autumn

when flowers bloom and are redolent,
i am most content
with their blossoming song, though redundant,
and my emotions, undulant.

and if you let me,
i will walk these fields of emerald green
and feel them tickle my feet;
i will then recoup my harmony.

the autumn breeze filled with fervor
will bring to this land pleasant weather,
listening to the wind's pacific murmur,
and sustain this feeling forever.

(c)2003 mai kozai

silence is also music. {1:04 PM}

Monday, September 22, 2003

reasons unnecessary

the reason i can go on
is not because you are pushing me to greatness;
it is because you are pulling me there.

the reason i sleep at night
is not because i want to forget reality;
it is because i want to dream our reality.

the reason i never abandoned hope
is not because i am completely hopeless;
it is because i am hopelessly complete.

the reason i smile
is not because i am afraid to show myself;
it is because i am myself.

the reason i wake in the morning
is not because i want to destroy the nightmare;
it is because i want to see the rising sun.

the reason i love You
is not because you make me the happiest person alive,
or because you hold me like that.
it's not even because the comfort you bring;
it is simply because you love me.

and if love is forever,
i am with you,
hand in hand,
eye to eye,
circling me in a constant direction,
always leading me back to you.

that is where i'm home.

(c)2003 mai kozai

*dedicated to You. for everything you've done for me and the adventures to come... thank you, and i love you.

silence is also music. {4:55 PM}

ocean of faith

on my defeated day,
the blue sky was stirring up a storm
no one else could see.
the trees were singing their funeral song
no one else could hear.
only me.

but somewhere in the ocean
i could still hear the echoes of yesterday.
and the crashing waves still represented
my strength.
i just lost all faith in finding it.

i waded in its shore,
and it slowly pulled me in.
it started to thaw out my feet
and sent a warmth up my spine.
i danced a little.

several steps later
my whole body was engulfed
and i let the waters take me away.
i heard the seashells humming their lullaby
as my vision fades to black...

sunlight from above and below
wrapping me in a blanket of faith.
is this it?
someone has given it to me.

i look up and he is there.
he smiles and says,
"i'm not happy if you're not happy."
he touches me and with his hands,
draws a smile on my face
i've forgotten for months.

i gently step out of his waters.
but i know it's always there when i need it.
draw me a smile, friend.

(c)2003 mai kozai

*dedicated to jay carvin, my best(est) friend. when no one dealt with me, you were always there. thanks for never, ever letting me down. i love you; i am always here for you.

silence is also music. {4:20 PM}

hello

dark surroundings,
warm atmosphere.
next to me,
my twin.

between sobs she tells me,
"i don't want to go through this tomorrow,"
but i know i will.
i was just waiting for the tears to come.

i promised myself not to cry,
but promises are maybe meant to be broken,
and here is another one today,
being broken.

i look at my twin, my best friend,
she doesn't look back.
but i know why.

one mind, two separate ways.
torn into two, unwillingly, they separate
and the torture and pain surface as tears.

but no goodbyes.
hello
forevermore.

(c)2003 mai kozai

*dedicated to felicia steinle, my other half. the title has two different meanings; and only she knows. thanks for everything. you are truly amazing.

silence is also music. {3:57 PM}